the clay & her Potter.

my life as i am being molded by the most kind Potter.

i am incredibly sorry for the delayed post. i am not sure if i have readers anymore but for the ones who are fellow clay being molded, thanks for your grace & understanding.

this past month & a half has been incredible. so much sweeter than i could have imagined. i feel incredibly rooted & invested here. it feels like home.

i have an amazing roommate who God blessed me with. she is truly a gift from our Father. i asked Him for a roommate and He gave me more than i asked for or even imagined. she is wonderful. my new apartment is so safe:: emotionally, spiritually, physically. such a place of rest!

work is simply amazing. i am always shown a new aspect of the Gospel while walking alongside of my colleagues & serving our clients. the Spirit is on the move in India and especially for the rescue & redemption of the bonded labour system. everyday i wake up & still can’t believe that i’ve been invited into this work. we had our first Freedom Training of this year & there were 85 clients who attended. it was beautiful:: sweet & so hard. 

church friendships, co-interns, my ironing family & colleagues have loved me so well. the investment is even deeper and sweeter than i anticipated. i feel so loved. my Dad has given me such gems to live life with. i celebrated my 25th birthday recently & i was drenched in gallons of love & joy. 

pray for me as i so desire to submit to the Lordship of our God. my heart has a hard time humbling itself as the piece of clay that it is & submitting to the workings of THE Potter. 

incredibly thankful

God has provided for me in such tangible ways that it is unbelievable. God has provided funds, housing, a roommate & daily grace in this transition.

i have had strangers ask how they can give, people who have known & loved me for years give with such generosity, i continue to have monthly supporters faithfully walk alongside of me and one-time-givers invest. i am in awe. i am humbled. i am so incredibly thankful.

i have a beautiful apartment that is sweet & small. but even more exciting is that i have a dear roommate who is sharing life with me. if you look a few posts before, i asked for your prayer concerning a roommate & God heard us! He provided & it was lavish. my roommate loves Jesus, His people, desires for our home to be a welcome place & one that is safe from hurt. i am so incredibly thankful.

i have been met with such grace during this transition. upon arrival, i met with my ironing family & we had such a sweet reunion. we have done so many family things:: breakfast at a restaurant, dinner at their home, a beach outing and shopping. they are so gracious to me; i felt like a celebrated & beloved princess! they express grace to me. i am so incredibly thankful.

you can keep praying for grace during this transition. i need guidance, wisdom and grace. 

he withholds no good thing

today i am reminded that my Father withholds no good thing from me. these past two months God has been teaching me that He is always at work for the good of His children.

let me say that again:: God is always at work. & working for the good of His children.

although that is a simple truth & one that is repeated throughout all of scripture, i often forget it. today God’s grace and provision overwhelmed me. He always proves that He is a Provider… a timely one. a Listener… & a doer. a gentle Dad who withholds no good thing from his beloved daughter.

‘if you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!’ matthew 7.11

i am humbled & deeply in awe of how Abba Father has provided for me. His love is so lavish. so extravagant that it humbles me to my knees. grace humbles me.

despite my worry. fear. anger. doubt. disbelief. (feeble) strivings & efforts. He provides. He remains sufficient. He withholds none.

His grace is sufficient. The Daily Bread sustains. 

blown away

i am blown away. i am left udone as i realize God’s tender leading in my life.

as many of you know; i have felt a strong calling towards india since 2005 when i first heard about the oppression many dalit people were facing. in 2006, my mom and i sponsored a six-year-old indian boy named vignesh. although Compassion International did outline his basic personal and family information, at the time i didn’t research the specifics (or understand as much as i do now about indian culture/geography).

we stopped sponsoring vignesh in 2009 but i still love him & think of him often. he was my first real connection to india; my first investment of love & intentionality to the country.

just tonight i decided to pull open my trifold folder stuffed with his hand-written letters, his bio and photos. i wanted to fall in love with the little pumpkin all over again.

as i re-read his bio for the first time in years; i was informed that he is from tamil nadu. a state i didn’t even know existed when i was matched with him; but now a state that i live in & love. the biography also stated that he is part of the ethnic group ‘Adi-Dravidar’… i quickly googled the term and was informed the phrase denotes ‘dalit’.

oh my word. i am blown away as i now comprehend these two facts:: vignesh is from a village southwest of madurai, tamil nadu. he was the first tamilian (& definitely not the last) that i fell in love with. he is a dalit & i will pray for dignity, strength, courage & worth to flow through his little heart & motivate his feet to love his people.

refreshment to my dry bones. 

(in one of the letters, he mentions that sambar is his favorite. at the time i had no idea what that meant; now i am thinking ‘of course! all tamilians LOVE sambar!’)

(written tamil. insanity that i held this paper years ago but just now realize what a treasure it is)

prayer

if you remember, please pray for me.

  • i need a roommate. my prayer is that my home would be a safe space that welcomes honesty, tears, joy and people. please pray that God would provide a girl who also wants the same things and needs a room in my apartment
  • funds. i need approximately $10,000 more. currently there is a Matching Grant that has committed to matching all of my donor’s gifts up to $5000. (refer to the link below if you would like to give)
  • rest. i have been so busy and my soul needs deep rest and refreshment. 
  • the transition:: i need grace. abundant grace and mercy as i transition out of america and back into chennai

truly, thank you. 

“you don’t have to save the world. if you wanna change the world, all you gotta do is show up.”

jill phillips.

365 days

365 days ago my feet touched indian soil, my lungs took a breath of india’s air, my eyes saw the people i had dreamed about as a young teenage girl… all for the first time. my heart beat a little faster while my soul began to rest. my dream was fulfilled 365 days ago.

so much of me has changed as the Tamilian people influenced my life, invaded my heart & wooed my longings to and for their people. 

i had dreamt about india for years. but now i am living life in this country that i consider a gem of this world. i wondered, wished, talked, prayed and saved for that moment. january 26, 2011… there i began living my dream!

i have seen so much need, brokenness, the capacity of evil and it’s men this past year. oh, how it’s made me hope in Jesus’ return. i have also seen such sweetness, simplicity, adoration, rescue, radical redemption and healing, joy & sacrifice (just to name a few). 

365 days down. & (at least) 365 days left to live life in the country of my dreams.  

my prayer as i enter into a new year:

‘into your hand i commit my spirit; you have redeemed me, O Lord, faithful God’ 

psalm 31.5